let me begin.

im not sure where to start but here we go.

im at the beach with my step-moms side of the family.
its been good.
the kids are great and we always have a lot of fun together
i just feel a little out of the box sometimes.

the beach is beautiful though.
its really hard not to come to the beach and not be a little inspired.
so i was.
i left the crew, went up and wrote.
unfortunately it didnt all come out as easily as i had planned.
what a shame.

do you ever just get tired of being yourself?
i do.
i can't seem to write anymore.
i can't seem to figure out what im supposed to be doing.
where im supposed to be going.
[i know, its easy right.
God will lead me.
honestly, at the moment, thats not the case.
or um, im not listening.
i know what i should be doing, but i continue to ignore it.
i just need this.
but THIS is just adding to all the confusion.]
why can't i just stop analyzing everything and chill.
[man, that would be fantastic.}
don't get me wrong, im okay with being me.
i just get annoyed with myself.
the way i act.
the way i carry myself.
i could point out all the things i like about myself, but i dont really know how to do that correctly.
[and when i say "correctly", i mean without sounding totally conceided and obnoxious
ill just say that for my next couseling session, psh, ha]

basically, when i get down to it, i just cant write at the moment.
im just, um, critizing myself.
its driving me crazy.
i need some inspiration.